THE BEST EFFORTS OF A RETIRED EDUCATIONAL INNOVATOR. Sister Joel Read, who recently retired as president of Milwaukee's Alverno College, offers some words of wisdom. I hope the editor is being kind. If that was her idea for a title, it's another reason to pull your kids from any classroom headed by an Alverno grad:

I don't think that any one action if taken on behalf of any one issue, by itself, can make Milwaukee a better place. The issues are too complex. Instead, we need multiple efforts on multiple fronts.

Specifics, please.

"Do I think that would be possible? Yes, I do, if there is the will to do so. There are multiple people with multiple talents and insights that could match and help resolve the multiple issues that confront us. Does this argue for some leader to pull it together so that there would be one solution that would make Milwaukee a better place? No. And here's why I think so."

I know it's good writing to avoid elegant variation, but the multiplication of multiples, again, without concrete proposals, doesn't help much. Or is the Sister simply conceding that she's not up to the task of being the leader, which would be her responsibility should she in fact spell out the problems and offer suggestions?

"We need solutions identified not by one gender or the other. We need both genders; we need to join our talents, interests, insights and the will to do and to get going on the things for which we have a passion."

Here's a classic non-sequitur. I was under the impression that Milwaukee's problems included nest-feathering county board members, inadequate schools (with not a few Alverno graduates in the classrooms), a few priests taking liberties with the altar boys, and indecision about whether to demolish or finish the expressways.

"Perhaps that is the one thing that would make Milwaukee a better place - collaboration on all fronts by both genders, whatever their race, color, religion, politics or economic status."

Collaboration on what fronts? Is this a weather report gone wrong, or is there a renegade Minnesota national guard unit making its way through the Kettle Moraine?

"There are already multiple efforts under way seeking to drastically improve our schools and the status of women and minorities in our economy. Every one of those efforts needs support of time, talent and funds by many more individuals than are currently involved."

Whose economy? Whose schools? Would this lady be able to write a term paper that would satisfy a competent eleventh-grade composition teacher?

"Great cities are the result of decisions made by each of the persons within that city who cherish it and demonstrate that they cherish it by the way they choose to serve the city and the neighborhoods in which they live. I believe such civic responsibility exists, can be harnessed through collaboration and channeled to issues of substance."

OK, put away the platitudes and spell out the issues. Good grief.

"As issues move toward greater and greater resolution, Milwaukee will be a better place."

Huh???