AVOID CANDY FLOSS, FLOSS MORE, AND HAVE NO FUN.

There's something fitting about an upscale suburb whose name sounds like the advice your dentist gives you engaging in truly joy-killing snob zoning.  "Five years ago, Luke Lambert and his wife bought a red brick house on a tree-lined street in this Chicago suburb. Two years later, he bought a blue 1966 Ford F-100 pickup with plans to fix it up." Sorry, no. You can't leave a pickup truck in a driveway overnight, because that might give the impression that the neighborhood is inhabited by tradesmen. (Never mind that tradesmen command salaries way beyond what your cubicle jockey can often hope for these days.)

It's an older suburb, and the kind of garage that accompanies an older house might be commodious for a Model A, or a Terraplane, but civilian pickup trucks, even the ones with the ridiculous short bed you can't put 4x8 sheets of plywood, sheetrock, or insulation in, tend to be higher and wider.  Here's Chicago Tribune coverage.

Pickup trucks aren’t the grubby, unsightly workhorses of yore. They’re no more likely to end up rusty, dinged and dented than your typical passenger car, SUV or other vehicle.

Automakers market today’s shiny pickups to families who pile kids into the back seats of extended cabs and shuttle them to school, soccer games and dance rehearsals. Some luxury pickups cost more than $50,000. Some are so big they can’t fit into some of Flossmoor’s small garages.

Apparently, the domestic automakers are shifting ever more of their production to passenger trucks, whether in the pickup form with that ludicrous short bed, or as sport-utes. And yet, advocates of relaxing the parking restrictions hope there will be a new birth of home improvement.  "Other residents said lifting the ban would encourage more people to spruce up their homes and yards. Making trips to home-improvement stores for mulch and other materials would be easier if pickups were allowed, they said. Home values might increase."  Right.

This is Flossmoor, though, and one resident wants it to stay that way.  "'We are an elitist community,' he said. 'This is Flossmoor. We are different from everyone else.'"

The Wall Street Journal notes that Flossmoor's snob zoning also prevents above-ground swimming pools.